How easy it is to feel anxious when you stay in a confined room or a house for too long? And think of your never-ending to-do lists, wish lists, bills, and thoughts? Focusing on one thing at a time has become more challenging, with digital media to distract you from your fleeting uncomfortable thoughts most of the time.
I miss days when I could devour a book in a day or two, draw until the picture is complete, dream without limits and many more little things that seem to be gone with age. I went out for a while to breathe — breathe the fresh cut grass and laid down to wonder, how does nature always have the capacity to heal? The sunsets, the majestic hilltops, the gurgling of flowing water in a stream, birds cooing, wind whispering, flowers of different colours enriching your visual palette. It is selfish of me to sit in a room and bask in troubles that my own devious mind brews to keep me engrossed. Negative thoughts have louder voices when you are alone, I have noticed.
Nevertheless, it is important to let go many a time. Trust me when I say no amount of cleaning and organising puts me to ease completely, but partially makes me feel in control of my surroundings. It is temporary, but the problem is deeply rooted in feeling negative — whether you are feeling lonely, hopeless, unworthy, angry, anxious, sad or simply cannot pin down your reason of feeling the blues.
Change is unnerving. And it is inevitable.